Every manager will face this moment: an employee walks into your office or sends an urgent message, and you can tell something is seriously wrong. Maybe they've received a devastating medical diagnosis, lost a loved one, or are dealing with a family substance abuse crisis that's turned their world upside down.
How you respond when your employees need you the most can make or break your relationship with them and greatly impact their life. Unfortunately, many leaders still struggle to respond with empathy when their team members need it most.
Supporting an employee through devastating news isn't just about being kind—it's about creating a workplace where people can bring their genuine selves to work even during their darkest moments. When workplace empathy takes the forefront, it can help improve productivity, and job satisfaction.
How Do I Know if My Employee Needs Help?
As an employer, knowing what signs to look for during emotional turmoil can help you understand how and when to offer them help. Some signs include:
- Their usual work pattern has changed. Someone who is usually punctual might start arriving late or missing meetings altogether. Someone who's usually organized might start missing deadlines or assignments.
- Communication might also change. An employee who is normally active and chatty, for instance, during meetings, might be unusually quiet or seem upset.
- Physical signs can be just as telling as behavioral ones. Does your employee look increasingly tired or disheveled? Are they using more sick days or frequently leaving work early?
- Their emotions are all over the place. These emotions might include increased irritability, being overwhelmed by routine tasks, or even mood swings that are uncharacteristic for that person.
What helps when recognizing these signs is knowing your employees well enough to know when something is off about them. This doesn't mean prying into their personal lives, but rather being observant and caring enough to notice even slight changes in their behavior.
Taking Immediate Action: Your First Response Matters
When an employee shares devastating news with you, your immediate response lets your employee know where they stand in your company. Are they just a number, or do they really care about you? This isn't the time for solutions or advice, it's time to be a leader and a human being.
Listen First, Problem-Solve Later
As an employer, your first instinct might be to immediately start thinking about coverage or minimizing team disruption. Resist this urge. Instead, focus entirely on your employee and what they need. You can use skills like:
- Maintain eye contact
- Using physical cues to show understanding
- Reflect what you're hearing
- Put away work computers or phones
Offer Employee Support Right Away
After you've listened and acknowledged their situation, shift to practical support. Ask directly: "What do you need right now?" Be specific in your offers, like saying, "I can reassign the project" or "Would it help if I covered your client calls for the rest of the week?" Whether your employee needs time off, needs deadlines extended, or other accommodations, try your best to meet their needs.
Keep Confidentiality
Unless your employee asks you to share news with the team, you never want to share their personal information. Your employee will know when, where, and how they want to share their news. In the meantime, maintain confidentiality among team members and reassure your employee their situation is safe with you.
Creating an Empathetic Workplace Culture
Individual acts of support are powerful, but the most meaningful change happens when you create a culture where empathy is valued and practiced consistently across the organization.
Train Your Management Team
Like any skill, empathy is something that can be practiced and learned. This is true for both employees and employers. Employees can be given lessons on cultural acceptance, safety, and even active listening skills. According to workplace empathy experts, managers should consistently practice perspective-taking—putting themselves in their direct reports' shoes when solving problems, managing conflicts, or deciding changes for their employees.
Model Empathy as a Leader
No one wants to work under a boss who shows no understanding to their employees. But, how can your employees know you're open to their feelings and willing to accommodate them if you say nothing? As a leader, remember to always set examples and be open about your care for your employees. From a warm greeting and weekly meetings, to reminding employees about different policies and having an open line of communication, modeling empathy is key in keeping your employees' morale boosted.
Recognize and Reward Empathetic Employees
When you see employees or managers demonstrating exceptional empathy and supporting their colleagues, acknowledge it publicly. Being able to reward people for being empathetic shows that a company not only values empathy but in fact requires it for its success. From the hiring process to continued culture, like volunteering time off or sick hours for others, there are plenty of ways you can reinforce empathy in your employees.
Continuing to Foster Empathy At Work
Supporting an employee through devastating news creates stronger relationships that benefits your entire organization. When your employee sees that their workplace truly cares about them as human beings, they're more likely to be engaged, loyal, and even be more productive (although this isn't the end goal).
Remember that empathy isn't weakness—it's a strategic advantage. When life turns an employee's world upside down, your response can be the steady hand that helps them find their footing again.
About The Author
Ric Burd is a highly experienced Certified Ergonomics Evaluation Specialist at Strategic Consulting Inc, which provides disability accommodations and vocational consulting services throughout the Pacific Northwest. He provides effective return-to-work solutions and is Matheson trained in Ergonomics . Ric is currently a Registered Vocational Rehabilitation Counselor for the Department of Labor and Industries and has been a Certified Disability Manager Specialist since 2006.
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